Quicksand

Part way through Helga’s second year in Denmark, she starts to feel vaguely discontent and a little restless. She wishes she could rid herself of these recurring feelings of dissatisfaction with “her life, with herself” but she doesn’t know how to. One day, she receives a letter from Anne, who writes that she is going to marry Dr. Anderson. This makes Helga feel even more annoyed, and she wonders why thinking about this man always upsets her. She could have stayed in Harlem, she reasons, but she would have been stuck in a country where black people are oppressed, talking about “the race problem” until the end of her days. The thought makes her nauseous.

A few days later, Helga goes to the theater with Herr Olsen and some other friends. She’s appalled to see two black men on stage singing ragtime and dancing with exuberance. The audience is charmed, but Helga feels ashamed, as if some secret part of her that she wants to forget has been exposed. She is full of hatred for the “cavorting Negroes on the stage.” Helga wonders why Herr Olsen and her friends admire her difference, when she despises it so much. 

Soon after, Axel Olsen finishes his portrait of Helga, and asks her to marry him. Helga is surprised. She’s wanted this for a long time, but suddenly feels repelled. She admits that Herr Olsen has complimented her before, but she had decided that his advances were insulting and ignored them. Now, Helga decides his body and voice are off-putting as she thinks with nostalgia about Harlem. She doesn’t understand why, but she’s frightened, embarrassed, and feels “stripped, naked” under Herr Olsen’s glare. He confesses that he is “disturbed” and “maddened” by Helga, and thinks the marriage will be “an experience.”

Herr Olsen tells Helga that she has been groomed by Fru Dahl to “sell yourself to the highest buyer,” and he is truly happy that the highest bidder is himself. At this comment, Helga answers coldly, “I’m not for sale. Not to you. Not to any white man. I don’t at all care to be owned. Even by you.” He is perplexed that she is refusing him. Helga explains that she can’t marry a white man because he might be ashamed of her darkness one day. Herr Olsen is irritated that Helga is bringing up “some strange talk of race and shame” when he's discussing marriage. Too proud to explain why race matters, Helga simply says that he waited too long and missed his moment.

Helga rises to say goodbye, and Herr Olsen proclaims their encounter “a tragedy,” just like Helga’s portrait, which he thinks captures “the true Helga Crane.” After Herr Olsen leaves, Helga thinks about how she’ll never quite get over the way he painted her, as “some disgusting sensual creature with her features.” Helga asks Marie what she thinks about the painting, and Marie answers cautiously that she doesn’t want to be rude about a great artist, but she thinks the painting is “bad, wicked.” Helga agrees.