Previous
November 2003
Themes
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in Still Alice, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Ambition and Success
Loss of Identity
Illness, Marriage, and Family
Alzheimer’s, Quality of Life, and Happiness
Summary
Analysis
Alice is looking forward to the first snow of the season as she and John walk to Eric Wellman’s annual holiday party for Harvard’s psychology department. Nothing very “extraordinary” happens at these parties, but Alice loves going to them because the people there all feel like family. Not only are they close in their personal lives, but they share a common ambition: “to understand the mind, the know the mechanisms driving human behavior and language, emotion and appetite.” It can be a stressful and “strange” life, but “they were in it together.”
Alice sees her colleagues as extended family, and this holiday party is their chance to socialize and enjoy their friendship without discussing work or deadlines. Alice has spent half of her life buried in work and raising children, and her colleagues likely fill the void of not having time for much of a social life. This passage hints that Alice may not have a close relationship (or any relationship) with her extended family, since it seems she only has John and her colleagues to share her experiences with.
Themes
At the party, Alice grabs a cream puff and goes in search of John. As soon as she finds him, Dan comes in with his new wife, Beth, who is wearing a bright red dress. Alice says she’ll have another glass of wine even though the one in her hand is still half-full. Alice excuses herself to go to the bathroom, finishing her wine on the way. Before going back to John, Alice stops in the kitchen to listen to the wives talk and get another glass of wine.
Earlier in the story, Alice mentioned that she usually only drinks socially in small doses, so it seems out of character for her to be drinking as much wine as she is. She may even be drinking more than she normally would because she has forgotten how much she’s already had to drink, illustrating the fact that her memory problems are starting to manifest in even more aspects of her life.
Themes
Alice finds John having a conversation with Eric, Dan, and a woman in a red dress. When the conversation between John and the others comes to a pause, Alice introduces herself to the woman in the red dress. The woman looks at Dan before nervously answering that she’s Beth. Alice doesn’t recognize her and asks Beth if she’s a new postdoc fellow. Beth tells Alice that she is Dan’s wife and Alice congratulates her and tells her how nice it is to “finally meet” her. Nobody replies to this, but Alice notices Eric looking from her wine glass to John. John tells Alice they should leave, leading her to the door. Alice means to ask what happened but forgets when she sees that it’s snowing.
In this case, the fact that Alice had been drinking is used to excuse her forgetting Beth so soon after being introduced to her. What is alarming, however, is that Alice does not quickly recover her memory of this as she has with other memory disruptions in the past. In fact, she forgets the fact that she had forgotten something in the first place after leaving the party. This brings up the possibility that there are other things she’s done (or not done) and completely forgotten about.
Themes
Three days before Christmas, Alice goes to the Memory Disorders Unit at Massachusetts General Hospital to see Dr. Davis, a neurologist. Alice explains her memory problems to Dr. Davis, who asks her how long she’s been having these issues and advises her to bring a family member with her in future because her memory problems might prevent her from being a “reliable source” of what’s happening. Embarrassed, Alice agrees to bring someone with her next time.
When Dr. Davis tells Alice that she needs to bring someone with her because she might not be a “reliable source,” it chips away at Alice’s identity as an independent person who is capable of taking care of herself. It sends the subtle message that she might no longer be in control of her own life and needs someone else to answer for her. Furthermore, the fact that Dr. Davis is so quick to tell her he wants her to come back is the first indication that he thinks she has a serious condition that will require follow-up.
Themes
Get the entire Still Alice LitChart as a printable PDF.
Dr. Davis asks Alice many of the same questions about her lifestyle, eating habits, sleeping habits, and mood that Dr. Moyer asked. Dr. Davis then asks questions about her family history and Alice tells him about the premature deaths of her mother and sister and her father’s more recent death due to liver failure as a result of his lifelong alcoholism. Alice only has “limited knowledge” of her extended family’s history.
Alice’s mother’s abrupt death at such a young age makes it difficult to judge whether or not she had a condition that might have been passed on to Alice. Additionally, her father’s alcoholism makes it difficult to differentiate between symptoms of a serious disease and typical behavior of a lifelong alcoholic.
Themes
Dr. Davis tells Alice that he is going to give her an address to remember. After that they will “do some other things” and he is going to ask her the address again. The address he gives her is “John Black, 42 West Street, Brighton.” Dr. Davis then asks Alice to answer some simple questions about her age, the date, the season, where they are, the time of day, and gives her some simple cognitive tasks, and Alice is able to do them without trouble. When Dr. Davis asks her to repeat the address, however, she is only able to remember “John Black” and “Brighton.” Dr. Davis gives her some options to fill in the rest of the information, but he does not tell her if she guesses right or not.
When Dr. Davis began asking questions, Alice was confident in her ability to sail through it because remembering an address is something she’s never had trouble with in the past. She takes for granted the idea that she can recall such a simple thing without actively trying to keep it in her mind, which accounts for her bewilderment when Dr. Davis asks her to repeat it and she finds she only remembers half of the address. Alice is now confronted with undeniable evidence that she can’t implicitly trust her short-term memory, causing her to question her mental faculties, which are the foundation of her identity as a professor and researcher.
Themes
Dr. Davis tells Alice that he has the results of her recent bloodwork and MRI, but he wants her to get some additional bloodwork and a lumbar puncture before coming back in a month. At her next appointment, she will have “neuropsychological testing” beforehand. Alice asks him if he thinks her problem is “just normal forgetting” and he tells her he doesn’t think it is and wants to “investigate it further.” Alice suspects that Dr. Davis knows what is wrong but doesn’t want to tell her.
Once again, Alice asks a question that the doctor is unwilling to answer, preferring instead to tell Alice that she must wait and take more tests without explicitly telling her what they are looking for or what they are afraid they’ll find. Just as she’s afraid to show too much fear or weakness to John, Alice doesn’t actively press her doctors for more answers because she is afraid of seeming “needy” (something John once called her) or too hysterical to handle the truth.
Themes
On the morning of Christmas Eve Alice looks through family photo albums. She hasn’t labeled any of the pictures when she put them in, but that doesn’t matter because Alice’s “diligence” and strong mind is able to recall who is in the pictures, when they were taken, where, and what was going on that day. As she looks through her children’s childhood photos of vacations and dance recitals, the photos “prompted other, unphotographed memories from that day.” John, however, struggles to do the same.
Further proof of Alice’s strength of mind is that she can look at a photograph and remember all the details about the day it was taken, which is something not even John can do. This also reveals just how much Alice loves her family—she is so easily able to remember even the most mundane details about their infancies and childhoods. Alice’s long-term memory is seemingly still untouched by the issues plaguing her short-term memory.
Themes
Alice brings up Lydia’s acting classes and tells John she wants to talk to him about paying for them “behind [her] back.” John apologizes and tells her she’s right, but that he disagrees that he shouldn’t pay for it at all because they paid for their other two children to go to college. Alice tells John this is different because Lydia is not going to college, and Alice worries that not going to college will hold Lydia back. The conversation ends when John realizes he has to get to work before going to get Lydia from the airport. Before leaving, John tells Alice that Lydia is “going to be fine,” but she doesn’t answer. They have had this conversation before and have never reached an understanding. John keeps “his status as the favorite parent” while Alice remains the strict one.
This argument resembles the “bottomless” one Alice and John have had over “battling” with Lydia. Like that argument, this one ends with John running off to work, entirely oblivious to how important it is to Alice that they really hash out the problem and reach an understanding. While both John and Alice are naturally concerned for the future happiness and well-being of their children, this argument also reveals that Alice has a very clear idea of how they achieve that happiness while John prefers to trust them to judge for themselves. This is why John is considered the “favorite parent” and further explains the tension between Alice and Lydia. It also implies that Alice likely holds herself to the same standards of success to which she holds her children.
Themes
Alice becomes more “relaxed” in John’s absence and looks back through the photo albums, which gives her “a renewed and reassuring confidence in the strength of her memory.” However, she also knows that these pictures and the memories related to them are stored in her long-term memory, not the short-term memory with which she is struggling. Without the ability to retain short-term memories, Alice knows she will not be able to create new long-term ones.
It is notable that John’s absence makes Alice feel “relaxed,” much like it did after her first disorienting episode in Harvard Square during her run—it was only after John left that she could allow herself to feel the full weight of what had happened. In this situation, John’s absence gives Alice the space and determination to really explore her ability to retain new memories. Much as she loves John, his presence is somewhat oppressive, as shown by how much more at ease she is when he’s no longer there.
Themes
Alice hears the mail get dropped into the slot and gets an idea. She looks at each piece of mail (a holiday greeting card, an ad from a gym, phone and gas bills, and an L.L. Bean catalog) and then sets it down. She waits five minutes and then repeats to herself what each item is. She successfully remembers each item, but then realizes that the experiment in the doctor’s office took longer and she needs is an “extended delay interval.”
This first memory test Alice conducts on herself shows how resourceful and intelligent she can be. She is capable of reasoning and analyzing her situation and quickly devise a way to measure her own capacity for retaining new memories, which could also mean that she’s also already devised ways to help supplement her failing memory. This would help explain why she waited so long to see a doctor at first—given her sharp mind, she may believe she can handle the problem herself.
Themes
Alice grabs her dictionary to pick a random word and lands on “berserk.” Alice sets a timer and starts making the holiday dinner. The timer goes off and Alice correctly remembers the word. Alice continues “playing this game,” increasing the number of words to remember and the time between picking and remembering them. The added difficulty does not prevent her from remaining “error-free.”
This exercise gives Alice a renewed confidence in her mind and its ability to make new memories, which in turn helps alleviate some of the stress she feels over the other tests Dr. Davis will have her do at her next visit. However, she fails to account for the fact that she can retain these new memories because she is consciously trying to do so, unlike in Dr. Davis’s office when she was so confident in her ability to remember the address that she didn’t make a conscious effort.
Themes
Anna, Charlie, Tom, and John are in the living room and Lydia is talking to Alice about her acting classes. Even though Alice doesn’t like Lydia taking these classes, she does not interrupt because she is so focused on making dinner and remembering her next round of words. But as Lydia continues to talk, Alice finds she can’t “resist being interested” in what she has to say.
Thus far, Alice’s pride has prevented her from accepting Lydia’s choice to pursue acting. What is most notable in this scene is that when Alice instead chooses to listen to Lydia talk about her passion, Alice finds that she enjoys this and is more interested in it than she has ever been willing to admit before. This could help pave the way for them to become closer in the future.
Themes
Alice’s timer to remember the words goes off, but instead of reciting the words she opens the oven and looks at the roast, which is obviously still undercooked. Suddenly, she realizes the timer was to tell her to remember her words, but she can’t remember all of them. Lydia is still talking, and Anna calls in to ask Alice where the wine opener is. Alice tries to ignore the noise to remember the word, but to no avail. Lydia is still talking, so Alice snaps at her and tells her she doesn’t want to hear about it. Lydia, “obviously hurt” turns away and then goes to help Anna. Once Lydia leaves, Alice remembers the words.
Unfortunately, Alice seems to have become so engrossed in what Lydia is saying that she forgets to keep the words she’s trying to remember in her mind. Her anger at Lydia is actually just a projection—the person she’s really angry at is herself since this failure on her part might mean that her short-term memory really is failing. There is also a similar feeling of sensory overload between this experience and her earlier one when she became disoriented in Harvard Square. Without truly realizing it, Alice has become extremely sensitive to noise and is no longer able to split her focus and multitask like she used to.
Themes
Alice grabs the ingredients for the white chocolate bread pudding she makes every Christmas Eve. When she grabs the eggs, she becomes confused: there are a dozen, but she doesn’t think the recipe calls for a dozen eggs and no longer has her mother’s handwritten recipe card for it. Furthermore, Alice “hadn’t needed to refer to it in years” because she’s been making it since she was a child. Still, Alice cannot remember how many eggs she’s supposed to use. Instead, she turns to the other ingredients, but doesn’t know where to start. Frustrated, Alice starts throwing the eggs into the sink.
This is the first instance of a disruption in Alice’s long-term memory. The bread pudding recipe is something that has been with her most of her life, so the fact that she suddenly can’t remember it shows that her forgetfulness is also starting to invade her long-term memories without her even realizing it. Furthermore, Alice becomes uncharacteristically emotional and angry over this situation, which is another sign that she is losing some mental equilibrium in her frustration and fear of what her symptoms might mean.
Themes
Alice turns to see a confused Lydia in the doorway. Lydia asks her what she’s doing and Alice tells her that the eggs were expired and there won’t be any bread pudding. Lydia tells her she will go to the store for eggs and make the pudding herself, and that Alice should go sit down with everyone else. Alice goes into the living room still “shaking,” but no longer overcome by anger. Before she leaves, Lydia looks into the room and asks Alice how many eggs she needs.
Lydia is the only witness to Alice’s emotional outburst, and Lydia is just as confused by this as she was when Alice forgot her BlackBerry at the restaurant in LA earlier. This is also the first situation in which Alice must turn to one of her children to take on her usual maternal role (making the bread pudding, in this case), needing to be calmed down and urged to rest in much the same way one might coax a child to calm down and rest.
Themes
